On a daily basis I struggle with the inner voices that I am very present to now. One is the voice of the past, filled with self doubt, filled with negative affirmations, that things will not work out, something always goes wrong, you will not succeed. And the other voice, from the present, the one that I am generating now, one that is filled with possibility, you deserve to create a future of endless wealth and prosperity. The process of transformation for me involves the movement between these two voices.
At some moments during the day I feel filled with hope and possibility, that I will be able to create my dreams, that I will be able to succeed at that which I am creating now. At other times I am filled with self doubt and even with the certainty that things will not go the way I want or desire. The emotional state of each voice is very different. The former generating a sense of happiness and joy while the latter is about me feeling fear and despair.
What I am learning is about how to react to the two voices that compete in my head, especially that from my past. When I become aware of the voice of the past, attempting to limit or even stop my dreams from becoming a reality, I merely sit with the voice. Being present to this voice while not engaging it, simply acknowledging it without trying to fight it or make it go away, resulting in my refusal now to give it the power that I once gave it.
Once acknowledged, I then begin to practice letting it go, of getting that it truly involves a story about myself that I have make up, that it is not reality or reflective of the truth. From this insight I begin to generate or create with my thought and word the language of the voice that I want to experience as my reality. Knowing that both voices exist gives me power to practice choosing which I will be at any given moment. It is work though, to be mindful of my inner self talk and how it attempts to take over and run my life.
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