Part of my practice of counseling is to stay present to the practice of acceptance. While our tendency is to make others wrong, to find fault with others, in what they say and do, my practice is to accept that which is presented to me. When a client shares my practice is to listen without judgement, to listen from a space where nothing is wrong, to listen from a space that he or she is doing the best that they can at the moment and the journey is about learning more, learning how to do things differently and more in alignment with loving the self and others. My practice is not about changing anyone as only the person can do that. My practice is about having a conversation with the person about how they create their life and how they do that from the thoughts that they have. It is from my thoughts, my thoughts about myself and my thoughts about others, my clients included, that I live my life. Acceptance is about accepting others for who they are and who they are not. Acceptance is about getting that everyone is perfect, whole and complete.
Monthly Archives: April 2008
Creating a Relationship Early in Recovery
One of the major Red Flags and causes of relapse is the creating of a relationship early in recovery. Even though many individuals are coached to avoid creating relationships in early recovery, many ignore the suggestion and do it anyway. When a person comes into recovery he or she is in a depressed emotional state. Intentional focus should be directed towards or upon the individual alone, upon the person figuring out how one is sourcing his or her experiences into life. This will require an inner journey. Most likely this journey will not be one of pleasure or joy. If a person creates a relationship early in recovery the work will most likely not take place. In addition to the focus now being upon the relationship and not the individual, the pain that must be looked into will be avoided, rather taking on the pleasure of a relationship, esp the sexual aspects of a relationship. If given a choice we will, as human animals, move towards pleasure and will avoid pain. Part of recovery requires that pain be faced and moved into and not avoided. Creating a relationship early in recovery is a major Red Flag.
More Red Flags
There are many Red Flags for one who is in the process of recovery. In addition to not communicating with ones sponsor, other Red Flags are missing or being late for meetings, becoming to busy for recovery work, never doing the homework assigned by a sponsor or therapist, never sharing in meetings, complaining about the meeetings, a sponsor or counselor, creating disruptions in meetings, not listening to those sharing in meetings, falling asleep or being tired in meetings, being resistant or arguing about the topic or subject of the meeting and leaving the meeting before it is finished. Part of the work of a counselor or sponsor is to coach the addict into recognizing the Red Flags as they appear in his or her behavior and how to communicate the Red Flag to another person, specifically his or her sponsor or counselor.
Enhanced Healing 